Kristina's letter to Ebba Sparre (APOCRYPHAL)

This letter to Ebba is undated.

Source:

Lettres secrètes de Christine, Reine de Suède, page 59, published by the Cramer Brothers, 1761

https://books.google.com/books?id=cPldAAAAcAAJ&dq=Lettres+Secrètes+De+Christine,+Reine+De+Suède&source=gbs_navlinks_s

The letter:

MA CHERE AMIE,
Si vous étiez ici, belle Comtesse, votre étonnement égaleroit votre satisfaction; c'est le pays des plaisirs & de la folie. Les amans y sont plus fourbes, plus empressés, & plus volages que par-tout ailleurs.

Avanthier, le Duc de Nemours allant au rendez-vous chez la Duchesse de Châtillon, qui l'attendoit avec empressement, fit une méprise heureuse qui lui causa beaucoup de plaisir, mais qui chagrina sa maîtresse impatiente. Le Duc entra dans la maison voisine de celle de la Duchesse. La femme de chambre, qui attendoit aussi à la porte l'amant de sa Dona, prit le Duc pour lui, le conduisit dans l'appartement, ajoutant que Madame étoit déjà couchée depuis une heure.

Le Duc, arrivé seul auprès du lit, se douta bientôt de l'avanture. Il connoissoit la Dame & sa maison. Il se glisse doucement auprès d'elle, profite du moment, & frustrant les droits de l'époux à la dérobée, il réveille à petit bruit la belle endormie, qui lui fit de doux reproches sur son peu d'empressement. L'obscurité de la nuit favorisa le Duc. Il fit son devoir avec des transports si violens & si réitérés, que l'infidelle innocente fut toute étonnée des vives caresses de ce nouvel époux. Après un si doux effet, elle en voulut connoître la cause. Tout parloit dans Neamours un amoureux langage; sa bouche seule étoit muette; mais un moment de repos, suivi d'un hélas tendre & passioné, la surprit bientôt. Elle connut son erreur. Le dépit succéda au plaisir. Le Duc découvrit le mystere, & en amant discret, il jura de garder un silence éternel.

Le mal étoit sans rémede; Vénus étoit aussi contente que surprise. Neamours, pour calmer son aimable conquête, dépêchoit un nouveau larcin d'amour. Elle sourit bientôt à son vainqueur, & la nuit fut, pour ces nouveaux amans, pleine de délices & de charmes.

English translation (my own):

My dear friend,
If you were here, beautiful Countess, your astonishment would equal your satisfaction. It is the land of pleasures and madness. The lovers are more cunning, more eager, and more volatile here than anywhere else.

Before yesterday, the Duke de Nemours, going to meet the Duchesse de Chatillon, who waited eagerly for him, made a happy mistake which caused him much pleasure, but which distressed his impatient mistress. The Duke entered the house next to that of the Duchess. The maid, who was also waiting at the door for the lover of her Dona, took the Duke for him, and conducted him to the apartment, adding that Madame had already been in bed for an hour.

The Duke, who had arrived alone by the bed, soon suspected the front. He knew the lady and her house. He slips slowly to her, takes advantage of the moment, and frustrating the rights of the husband by stealth, he wakes the little sleeping beauty, who made him soft reproaches on his lack of eagerness. The darkness of night favored the Duke. He did his duty with transports so violent and so reiterated that the innocent infidel was astonished at the lively caresses of this new husband. After such a sweet effect, she wanted to know the cause. Neamours spoke everything in a lover's language. His mouth alone was silent, but a moment of repose, followed by a tender and passionate alas soon surprised her. She knew her mistake. The frustration followed the pleasure. The Duke discovered the mystery, and as a discreet lover, he swore to keep an eternal silence.

The evil was without delay; Venus was as happy as she was surprised. Neamours, to calm his amiable conquest, despatched a new larceny of love. She soon smiled at her conqueror, and the night was, for these new lovers, full of delights and charms.

Above: Kristina.

Above: Ebba Sparre.